Song Lyrics

Twisted

by Ross and Grey

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My analyst told me
That I was right out of my head
The way he described it
He said I'd be better dead than live
I didn't listen to his jive
I knew all along
That he was all wrong
And I knew that he thought
I was crazy but I'm not
Oh no

My analyst told me
That I was right out of my head
He said I'd need treatment
But I'm not that easily led
He said I was the type
That was most inclined
When out of his sight
To be out of my mind
And he thought I was nuts
No more ifs or ands or buts

They say as a child
I appeared a little bit wild
With all my crazy ideas
But I knew what was happening
I knew I was a genius...
What's so strange when you know
That you're a wizard at three
I knew that this was meant to be

Now I heard little children
Were supposed to sleep tight
That's why I got into the vodka one night
My parents got frantic
Didn't know what to do
But I saw some crazy scenes
Before I came to
Now do you think I was crazy
I may have been only three
But I was swinging

They all laugh at angry young men
They all laugh at Edison
And also at Einstein
So why should I feel sorry
If they just couldn't understand
The idiomatic logic
That went on in my head
I had a brain
It was insane
Oh they used to laugh at me
When I refused to ride
On all those double-decker buses
All because there was no driver on the top

My analyst told me
That I was right out of my head
But I said dear doctor
I think that it's you instead
Because I have got a thing
That's unique and new
To prove it I'll have
The last laugh on you
'Cause instead of one head
I got two
And you know two heads are better than one

© 1965 Prestige Music

Footnotes to Twisted

Joni spoke the following between verses of Twisted on August 22, 1974 at Temple University in Ambler, PA:

I’m a little looney. Are you crazy? [audience: “Yeah”] He's crazy, are you crazy? There's a sane person in our midst. Unbelievable. [laughs] There’s two sane – three sane people. I think you’re a little crazier than what’s led to be expected, in these times – right?

I’ll tell you a little story. I went to see a shrink one time. This is a true story, and sometimes truth is funnier than fiction. I went to see a shrink and I said to him “Doctor, I’m losing my memory. I think that I am prematurely senile.” He said to me “I think you’ve come to the wrong psychiatrist, but I’ll put you in a group therapy session with six shrinks so you can choose the one you like the best.” So he put me in with six shrinks and an actress, and I sort of went supermarketing for the guy that was to be my guru in this particular field.

So, anyway, the first thing that happened at that meeting was that there was a silence that fell over the room. I presume that happens whenever a new member comes. And to break the silence the head shrink, you might say – the head head shrink – put his monocle up to his eye and, in a German accent, he said “Tell me, Henry. You had, the other night – an interesting dream. The group would be interested to hear it.” Then he leaned back. So Henry leaned forward in his seat and he said “Dr. Grochung, I’ve been coming to you for five years Dr. Grochung, my name is Harry” he said. So I figured what can a shrink with a bad memory do for a person with a bad memory?

[Joni's band starts up again] Hey, wait a minute! Wait a minute! Wait a minute! Wait a minute! Hold it. Hold it. The school system doesn’t -- What makes you the most crazy? I’m not through yet. [loud applause] What makes you the most crazy? Since that one bombed, this is Take Two. Could somebody volunteer what makes them the most crazy? Don’t be cute. Tell us the truth. [several audience responses are shouted] People make you crazy. Does the school system make you crazy? [mild applause] Does the government make you crazy? [wild applause] Do you think your nose is too big? Are you ashamed of your appendectomy scar? They always airbrush them out of the Playboy centrefolds, if you’re feeling insecure about that, girls. That’s true – it’s true. Well, all I want to say to you at this point, ‘cause we’re all going off to play poker again, is that, uh, I hope you enjoy your craziness, ‘cause it can be a lot of fun.

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